SPECIAL EDITION

hmm .. i have updated my song !! =) one of my favourite songs !! In case you cannot load properly in youtube.com , here you go !! can enjoy listening it here !! And yeah , you owe me one slice of pandan cake !! XD ...

Ok lets start the special edition on my blog : This is the story based on me !! How i live without her for the past 13months !! How i suffered after i get to know i am given a notice that will be fired away and how i crushed myself down in a pathetic way !!

Stories began since 5 years ago, we began our couple and sweetest fairy tales life for almost 3 and a half years !! everything went smooth as usual !! i promised to guard her life no matter what happened !! and , we have some argument sometimes as we staying together , there is a definitely happened things in every couple life as she showed me her true color and i will show out what i belong to !! But after all , we apologized to each other and pass our life happily !! Rainbow not always show out after raining ; good luck is not always beside me thou i got lucky charm !! Last July, she went to Sydney for her further studies !! OMG , do anyone really believe in long term relationship ?? For me, i really believe it as i am confident that nothing will happen to bring away the bond we have created during the past 3 years !! But , as what i said, no one is going to be lucky forever !! Yeap , she is kinda good to me !! Wait till the very good timing baru dumping me !! She waited till i passed my uni last paper over and text me that we are over !! and no one or anything can recover the feeling that we used to have !! Omg .. this is sorry to me , but i am not sorry to her !! Because the problem is she lost the feeling that i used to have with her !! *and i strongly believe that there is someone behind making this kind of things happened as before she flew to Sydney , that biatch is really summoning some spell to brain wash her* !! Okie okie .. so , the nightmare begins !! Oh gosh ... i drink , drank , drunk in order to immobilize my thinking !! Yea yea ... club is the only way can release all the tension , anger and unhappiness !! (Thanks botak , michelle , youth , wei jen , james, william and a lot more who encouraing me during the journey of unhappiness and darkness)

For the first 6 months which my life without her , i really think that the world is over !! my plan is fail since i fail to plan !! and i got the thought of being some rubbish and doing nothing beside paralyze myself with alcohol since i lost an important person in my life !! everyday , i repeated my activity that is really shameful to my parents , sleeping , drinking , sleeping , drinking ........ !! What else i contributed to this world ?? nothing beside crying every night while i was in the room !! Hmm .. the feeling of being alone after switch off the light , no one can listen my grief and no one can understand how sad i felt !! Crying also useless !! Eyes turning red everyday because of this heartbroken thing happened to me !! Oh yeah , the best part is , after crying , i still feel energitic and want to continue for second round of sobbing !!! I thinked this should be the Most Terrible thing That happen to a MAN !! Yeah yeah ... the most so haiz thing not yet over !! AFter i accept what is so called FATE !! My mind is calm down after this first 6 months of torturing !! Yea .. once my gang told me : Alex , you really scared no pussy let you fuck ark ?? You not 八俩金, see how smart are you when you not crying !! Oh yea , and you got the advantage , you are so ambitious and have the brain to do things , now you are not the one losing something important , it might be the other way round !! Lets think if you success within the next 2 years , she will be regretted for kicking ur ass out of the kingdom !! (Thanks hung hung , calling from so far to peace my mind !!) . Hahahah ... XD ... i am so relieve after getting a lot support from all of my friends !! And now , i am on my way to a better life !! i am just like a new leaf !! And Wei Jen said : Tomorrow is always filled with hope !! yeah yeah .. tomorrow is a better day !!

p/s: Thou i am not sad anymore , but frankly , i still feel so piss off after i get to know that she is getting along with guy which is much much lower ranking than me !! Lols .. if you both soi zai and soi mui never tell me , wakaka .. i will never compare myself and him lor !! lols .. obviously, i am Ben-ci , he is Bus-ci !! Xp ...

This is shortest version how i felt about my EX !! And yeah ... we can be a best friend in the future !! =) Oh , sure a lot people after reading this will ask , why har alex posting this kind of thing !! Hmm ... since i promised someone i will tell her how i felt about my ex 2 days ago , so i think the best solution is i post it here , she can read it , and all of my friends can know what is really happening to me !! and yeah ... my houseline is sucks to the max !! If i never reply any of ur msn msg , please dont think i am lan ci or hidung tinggi , because my msn sot sot !! Er ... in other term , house internet line is CHEAP !! (T____T)